Profile: ISFJ
Revision: 3.1
Date of Revision: 20 Aug 2007
ISFJs are characterized
above all by their desire to serve others, their "need to be needed."
In extreme cases, this need is so strong that standard give-and-take
relationships are deeply unsatisfying to them; however, most ISFJs find more
than enough with which to occupy themselves within the framework of a normal
life. (Since ISFJs, like all SJs, are very much bound by the prevailing social
conventions, their form of "service" is likely to exclude any
elements of moral or political controversy; they specialize in the local, the
personal, and the practical.)
ISFJs are often
unappreciated, at work, home, and play. Ironically, because they prove over and
over that they can be relied on for their loyalty and unstinting, high-quality
work, those around them often take them for granted--even take advantage of
them. Admittedly, the problem is sometimes aggravated by the ISFJs themselves;
for instance, they are notoriously bad at delegating ("If you want it done
right, do it yourself"
. And although they're hurt by being treated like
doormats, they are often unwilling to toot their own horns about their accomplishments
because they feel that although they deserve more credit than they're getting,
it's somehow wrong to want any sort of reward for doing work (which is
supposed to be a virtue in itself). (And as low-profile Is, their actions don't
call attention to themselves as with charismatic Es.) Because of all of this,
ISFJs are often overworked, and as a result may suffer from psychosomatic
illnesses.
In the workplace, ISFJs are
methodical and accurate workers, often with very good memories and unexpected
analytic abilities; they are also good with people in small-group or one-on-one
situations because of their patient and genuinely sympathetic approach to
dealing with others. ISFJs make pleasant and reliable co-workers and exemplary
employees, but tend to be harried and uncomfortable in supervisory roles. They
are capable of forming strong loyalties, but these are personal rather
than institutional loyalties; if someone they've bonded with in this way
leaves the company, the ISFJ will leave with them, if given the option. Traditional
careers for an ISFJ include: teaching, social work, most religious work,
nursing, medicine (general practice only), clerical and and secretarial work of
any kind, and some kinds of administrative careers.
While their work ethic is
high on the ISFJ priority list, their families are the centers of their lives. ISFJs
are extremely warm and demonstrative within the family circle--and often
possessive of their loved ones, as well. When these include Es who want to
socialize with the rest of the world, or self-contained ITs, the ISFJ must
learn to adjust to these behaviors and not interpret them as rejection. Being
SJs, they place a strong emphasis on conventional behavior (although, unlike
STJs, they are usually as concerned with being "nice" as with strict
propriety); if any of their nearest and dearest depart from the
straight-and-narrow, it causes the ISFJ major embarrassment: the closer the
relationship and the more public the act, the more intense the embarrassment (a
fact which many of their teenage children take gleeful advantage of). Over
time, however, ISFJs usually mellow, and learn to regard the culprits as
harmless eccentrics :-). Needless to say, ISFJs take infinite trouble over
meals, gifts, celebrations, etc., for their loved ones--although strong Js may
tend to focus more on what the recipient should want rather than what
they do want.
Like most Is, ISFJs have a
few, close friends. They are extremely loyal to these, and are ready to provide
emotional and practical support at a moment's notice. (However, like most Fs
they hate confrontation; if you get into a fight, don't expect them to jump in
after you. You can count on them, however, run and get the nearest authority
figure.) Unlike with EPs, the older the friendship is, the more an ISFJ will
value it. One ISFJ trait that is easily misunderstood by those who haven't
known them long is that they are often unable to either hide or articulate any
distress they may be feeling. For instance, an ISFJ child may be reproved for
"sulking," the actual cause of which is a combination of physical
illness plus misguided "good manners." An adult ISFJ may drive a
(later ashamed) friend or SO into a fit of temper over the ISFJ's unexplained
moodiness, only afterwards to explain about a death in the family they
"didn't want to burden anyone with." Those close to ISFJs should
learn to watch for the warning signs in these situations and take the
initiative themselves to uncover the problem.